Conversations with Wentworth Miller

Earlier, we told you about Wentcrazy, who has been detained indefinitely due to his Wentworth Miller impersonation spree. We are happy to report that we have finally reached Wentworth Miller for comment and he has agreed to give us an exclusive interview regarding this still developing situation. We now take you to Wents’ secret location…

WFW: Went?

Went: Yes, I’m here.

WFW: Hey Baby, how’s it goin?

Went :WFW! I’ve missed you. I’m good; What’s up with you?

WFW: Oh nothing much, just wondering how you’re holding up and how it’s hanging…a little to the left if I remember correctly…

Went: *laughs*

WFW: So Went, what’s the deal with this evil bastard trying to make you out to be some sort of player or something?

Went: Well we’re not sure. We think it’s like, some sort of PR ploy because I’ve never officially taken a stance on the whole sexuality thing. You know I’m a private person and really it’s no one’s god damn business but mine. Besides you already know what I like.

WFW: Do I ever! That’s what I thought though. So, why not instead of answering, just go the Paris Hilton route and make a sex tape? I mean pictures don’t lie…well unless they’re photoshopped…OK bad example but you get the idea. I think that would definitely set the record straight…so to speak. You know what? I’ll star in it with you. How does that sound?

Went: It sounds great but there’s really no need. Fuck em all.

WFW: Does that include me?

Went: *laughs* Of course…Hey is that you across the street?

WFW: Well yeah…

Went: So why’d you call me if you were just gonna show up?

WFW: Well, you know how I like to be on top of things…


WFW: *laughs too* You always did love my puns you wicked man. So, what’s next on the Wentworth Miller appearance schedule?

Went: I was thinking I might fly somewhere, you know, just to be spotted in the airport or have my photo taken…to prove that all of this hasn’t gotten me down.

WFW: As I remember it, it takes a lot to get you down…

Went: *laughs* How is it you can make ANYTHING sound sexual?

WFW: It’s a gift.

And there you have it folks. Down but not out, Wentworth Miller presses on while Wentcrazy twirls in circles, reciting Jay-Z lyrics. I wonder what’s next for Wentcrazy? A Prison Break maybe?

pics courtesy of Just Jared


Filed under Fake Interviews, Humor

25 responses to “Conversations with Wentworth Miller

  1. tbaby

    WFW, you really have a world in your mind, rich in texture, color, and Wentastic conversations.

    Thank you for letting us come in for a little visit.

    I think Wentcrazy lives there too. Along with Wentnasty. Oh, didn’t you know there were triplets? No? Oh, that must be in MY world. Hmmm…

  2. geniass

    Thanks Went for taking time out of your busy pants dropping schedule for the official word. 😉

  3. Anonymous

    all i want to know is: how many inches is it?
    c’mon, WFW….
    give up the goods!

  4. Anonymous

    That’s just too funny, I’m always so entertained by your vivid imagination.

    Just when I thought you couldn’t get funnier….you surprise me.

    WFW….I guess it’s a gift.

    Don’t let those ticky publicists send you bogas info and get away with it.

  5. Anonymous

    that’s….. tricky-publicist’s

  6. tia

    Is it just me or does the fact that his sexuality is so ambiguous makes him even sexier, with anyone else I would be so turned off if that was in debate, but the fact that he may be into boys and girls or just boys period makes me all moist down there

  7. notthedoctor

    LOL! you are hysterically hilarious… and i’m the one with the hysterical laughing!

    I agree with tbaby, you live in your own world like The Truman Show, but yours’ better because it’s The Wentworth Show!!! you get to write everything you want it to happen and Wenty says and DOES it!
    I applause the Queen of Wentlust!

  8. Anonymous

    i was so waiting for you to ask what’s in his pocket….one hell of a wallet. another masterpiece tho…hell, you’re a legend at my workplace..we’re all having coffee breaks around the computer reading your newest offerings…you bring joy to our humdrum existence…see how bad it is?? i’m using the word humdrum.

  9. mink

    WFW, thanks for getting Went on the line to clear that up. But you know, I always thought this boy dressed to the right…

    Oh, and I’m with tia on the sexuality thing. I have absolutely no idea why, mind. It’s another ‘Only Went’ thing. I’m sure this is some kind of special phenomenon. Which means it must require a special study. I wonder if there would be a grant available…

  10. soiled undies

    WFW: I like being on TOP too!

    *longing sigh*
    We have so much in common!

    I think this stems from never getting those riding lessons that I wanted as a child.

    Now I just turn people into my own personal ponies.
    Bet Went’s a stallion…Mmmmmmm….

  11. Linds

    I am never reading this blog during lunch again – you had me choking on my canteloupe!!!

  12. Wet For Went

    tbaby, what other people call “hearing voices,” I call inspiration. Wentnasty sounds interesting. I definitely need to meet him.

    geniass, he always seems to have time for me when I really need him. Gotta love that man.

    anon 4:32, I’m afraid I’ve signed a “contract.” That’s all I can say. *looking over my shoulder*

    anon 5:32, *blushing* Thanks. Damn those misleading publicists. They will not win!

    tia, yup it turns me on, Jake G style.

    notthedoctor! LOL, thanks.

  13. Wet For Went

    Is that my buttercup? *smiling* I defintely thought about it! You are too sweet.

    Mink, since my view is usually from my knees, you could be right about the direction…Wentworth Miller…creating whores all over the world…

    LOL su. Stallion indeed.

    linds, it’s part of my master plan to kill each and every one of you so that there will be no women left for Went but me.

  14. Anonymous

    I’m reading this for the second time and ….this is some funny shit!!!

    You need your own talk show I think.

  15. Wet For Went

    Why thank you anon 11:40. I was cracking up while I was writing it, lol.

  16. darc

    hahah really funny good job lovd it

  17. sxc beast

    is this convo made up or is it tru?

    thought u sed u dont no him

  18. Jaynie

    I just have to say that when I have sex with my husband I think of Wentworth Miller. When you are married sex is the same all of the time so it’s nice to think of myself eating up Wentworth!!!!! Maybe someday I’ll get to meet him. I thank God everyday for Prison Break.

  19. Alison

    This is some very funny shit, I’ve enjoyed the hole time I’ve spent here. “a little to the left if I remember correctly..” *laughin’ my ass off*

    Wentworth Eye-fuck Miller, love him.

  20. sXc Girl

    this page is so funy. . . . . . but rely ya hav 2 admit…. he is d most sex’c’ist person ever…no rely doh if i got at him . . . . . . . id kik my boyfrend outa the house and id tie went 2 d bed and you can gess 4m dare. . . . (steamy stuff)!!!!!! ye hav made my day wit dis site…. got me al hot nd boderd tinkn about sexy miller now…. buy,,,,, xXxXxXxXxXx

  21. went,u are so not do anything of this.we believe u .u can’t be a gay.if they say u are,the word must mean any other thing.i love your confidence,your reply.i mustn’t also forget your smile”you’ve 4 smiles”.you are great,don’t listen to these u,really iwant to contact u,just to be friends.bye.i hope i see u onetime………

  22. Mrs Wentworth Miller

    u chat frm ur bck side bcoz wentworth is mine

  23. just want to say hello to went…=)

  24. TOYIN

    hi just to say i believe in you and i have a sister falling over heels in love with you. she will love to meet you seriously.well you are cool and its been fun watching prison break and everyday i say God bless prison are too sweet

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