Wet For Went’s Wentworth Miller Masturbation Workout

I figure, everyone is all into this fitness thing these days so I said to myself, self, you should release a workout tape or DVD or something and make some quick cash…when I remembered that no one who looked at me would believe I worked out I said to myself, fat ass, why don’t you release an instructional step by step guide combining your two favorite things: Cumming and Wentworth Miller, and then I said back to myself, YES! That’s it! And so I present to you: Wet For Went’s Wentworth Miller Masturbation Workout or WFWWMMW; A way to get you through your workday and your miserably horny and Went-less existence.

Warm up:

Drink some water. In fact, drink a lot of water. 48 oz. is good and don’t go to the bathroom for a while. Yes this will be important later, so do it. Trust me. *grin*

Step 1

Learn to masturbate without using your hands. I know that this a tall order for some of you so I will say, skip this if you weren’t born with the obscenely pleasant and ridiculously convenient talent I was born with. Sometimes, I fucking love my life.

Step 2

Make sure no one else is around, unless you’re into that sort of thing. I leave my office door open but I can hear someone coming and sometimes, it’s kind of hot to be almost caught. I wonder what the people at work would think if they saw my head thrown back and a look of absolute ecstasy on my face. Can you say RAISE?

Step 3

Decide just how many orgasms it’s going to take to satisfy you. Three is usually the magic number for me. Actually, this one is kind of up in the air as you don’t know how many you will need until you get down to business. So let’s move on to

Step 4

Get yourself a Wentworth Miller photo. I like to start with the one I affectionately refer to as “The Mock Cock.” Observe:

Notice how it looks as if he is holding…himself. Mmmm…Now imagine him stroking his beauuuuuuuutiful…self and go with that. Zoom in on the crotch area…Isn’t that nice? Fuck yeah it is….Mmmm….

Step 5

Cum

Step 6

Realize that one is not nearly enough and move on to

Step 7

Get yourself another Wentworth Miller picture. These days I move on to the one I affectionately refer to as “Getting Fingered.” Have a look:

Mmmm, look at those fingers. Imagine them going in and out and in and out and wiggling around in there a little and in and out…Now look into his eyes…that’s it, that’s it…

Step 8

Cum Again

Step 9

Realize that one-sided “romance” is sad and a little pathetic. You want Went to cum WITH you! So make him, by using a pic I affectionately refer to as “Wentstacy.” And here it is:

Oh yeah, oh yeah, he’s cumming with you this time. Oh GOD it’s gonna be good. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, oh fuck, SHIIIIIIIIIIIIT

Step 10

Regain consciousness. Control the eyes now. They’re rolling up into your head and it looks like you’re having a seizure. Stop shaking, calm it down now, I think you’re OK. You should be throbbing now and plenty satisfied. But guess what? It’s not over…

Cool Down:

Go pee. I know you’re thinking, WFW, what the fuck does this have to do with anything? Shut up and Just. Go. Pee.

And now you’re done! Working out will never be the same again.

This has been Wet For Went’s Wentworth Miller Masturbation Workout. Donations can be sent in lieu of your first born, by clicking the Paypal Donate button in the sidebar. *bowing* Have a fantastic day.

53 Comments

Filed under Humor, WFW

53 responses to “Wet For Went’s Wentworth Miller Masturbation Workout

  1. Neila

    Without using your hands?!! Unless there is a shower massager involved, I’m having a difficult time picturing this. Yet, somehow I feel that congratulations are in order. 😉

    And thank you for making me incredibly horny and sexually frustrated at a time of the day when I’m unable to do anything about it. *heaving sigh*

  2. the.red.head

    Good advice. Yes, lots of water is needed. Hydration is key for this sort of thing.

  3. SavMed

    I am probably the only female entity on this planet that cannot cum with Wenty in my mind while….well doing ‘things’.

    The reason is I love him ( well, I love the image my mind created )!

    I promise to ‘work out’ ardently and inform you when my mind comes to its senses and I finally achieve ‘the goal’.

    Until I achieve ‘the goal’, you can call me Haywire.

    p.s. do i get a certificate or something?

  4. notthedoctor

    *STANDING OVULATION*

    Good thing I don’t have a first born, he/she’d be shipped your way in a New York minute… nah, the Post Office would keep him/her anyway!
    LYNCH POST OFFICE!
    *endless clapping*

  5. shortstuff

    wow.. working out was never so good..

  6. nicbeast

    “Learn to masturbate without using your hands. I know that this a tall order for some of you so I will say, skip this if you weren’t born with the obscenely pleasant and ridiculously convenient talent I was born with. Sometimes, I fucking love my life.”

    Sucks to be me…

  7. shortstuff

    ps: the cbox stopped working for me… :S

  8. Krissie

    DAMMIT!
    Could you not have posted this like an hour ago?
    Never mind, an episode of PB worked out just fine for me.
    Next time, I promise, I’m doing it your way.

  9. Mama Bear

    This beats Pilates and Tae Bo any day of the week! Thanks for the play-by-play…I agree with you, “three” is definitely the magic number. Well, make that at least three!

  10. Geisha

    Wow. That second pic did it for me. I swear I saw his lips move and called my name.

  11. Dani

    OH NO!!

    Shit my clit is stuck in overdrive!

    –What do I do now???

  12. Anonymous

    WFW, YOU’RE CRAZY AND I FUCKING LOVE YOU!!! LMFAO!

  13. Anonymous

    haha
    you made my day WFW !

  14. katjus

    Truly inspired I am off to home soon from work and i shall put all tyour instructions in action. But for us non-americans could you make your next instrustions in european measurements as the whole “oz.” is only making me think about another series based in a prison and then my mide flys to PB and to… Criket! Fucking awesom! Did you plan this? Mind map for us euro trash from water to Went? Jesus, you ARE a genius…!
    I salute you! Kiss.

  15. linds

    On masturbating sans hands – Two words : Kegel. Exercises. YAY WFW!! I can now officially say I am a work out fanatic *huge cheesy grin*

  16. wents_sexy_brunette

    Wow! This is the first time I saw this site and it’s awesome.haha. I luv the WFWWMMW eventhough I didn’t masturbate to it. I just gotta see Went and I cum.haha.

  17. DBN

    Oh my god, I just saw this. You are fucking hilarious. And now thanks to you, I am fucking Went at my desk. Sans hands, of course. It is a blessing indeed.

    And yes, the post-spew-pee is a beautiful thing.

    *kisses*

  18. WFW

    ahahaha DBN, this is one of my favorites…

  19. Lmao! You never fail to make me laugh, I love your witty posts, keep em coming!

    Be sure to check out the all new Wentworth Miller forum!! created by Clear_Light & Exynina, wet for went we love ya girl! but I thought a plug in here would be fab!

    Ta very much!

    xxx

  20. I swear each and every time I come here I find something new and fantastic to read.
    Your killing me girl!!
    God I love this page..hee hee

  21. Trinity

    Out-freakin-standing! I have to say the visual aids really did it for me.

  22. hailie

    congratulations 🙂
    i like it.

  23. Anonymous

    Your crazy…..
    LMAO… I was never into “working out” .. until now … hee hee

  24. alrightynow

    this is genius you’re crazy and we love it. 3(magic number) cheers for wfw

  25. meeee

    you.
    are.
    amazing.

    afhjsdgfshdfgsdhf.
    uhhhhhhhh

  26. Chiorina

    I just wanted to say thank you for posting great pictures with great sizes!

  27. I.Love.My.Guitarry.Starry

    *sits in awe* this rules so much. 😀

    YAY !!!!

    three is the best number 😀

    especially with Went involved *grins*

  28. AnjA

    I dont even know who went is, but damn he fine..

  29. buffytritt

    I’ve never laughed so much, thank you, I love your website and all the funny things you and the rest of the girls are writing!

  30. Raz

    Where has the pics gone?! I just sent a link to a certified Swedish nymphomaniac friend of mine and now the pic’s are GONE???

    Your words are great, WFW, but we need some eye candy too … Especially that first pic… Hm.. Sleep tight. This site made every single day – hm – a fitness celebration.

  31. Maria

    You are truely a genious…that was a perfect presentation
    and the pics wow they go so well
    I must workout more then 3 times a day…fit in no time and ready for the real him (i wish)

  32. PAULUŚ

    KOCHAM GO NAD ZYCIE TYLKO TY WENTUSIU

  33. PAULUŚ

    TYLKO MNIE KOSIAJ WENTULEK

  34. PAULUŚ

    HE IS FAMOUS AND PRETTY LOVE FOR MUCH

  35. Pingback: Merry Wentmas Boys and Girls « Wet For Went

  36. OCee78

    wow! didn’t see that coming! curiosity can definitely kill the cat haha

  37. sueli

    The title didn’t give it away, OCee? If I knew Miller I’d give him so much shit about this…

  38. Not Getting A Whole Lot Else Done

    Lovey, this is quite literally the most genius thing I have ever read on the net. Your site is brilliant! Such dedication to the Wentworth cause should not go unrewarded if the universe is in any way fair….but in the meantime…keep it cumming 😉

    PS: I can do the no hands things too: comes in handy on long bus rides where sticking your hands down your knickers is generally frowned upon. I’m still working on the “I’m not cumming right now face” though (oops).
    PPS: Let’s not be too mean about Amie, girls. Friend, girlfriend, or just a date, she looks like a cool gal and if we love Went then we have to love his choices too.

    Lecture over…off for a wank: Greetings from the UK!

  39. myriam

    wentworth miller i adore him he is so sexy

  40. myriam

    and thank u for your advices i ‘m horny and i’m going to do it right now

  41. After reading this article,I want to go out to see the movie with my boy firend.
    Goodbye and Good Luck.

  42. maria

    Your mind goes so far.I mast say you’re my hero

  43. Is Wentworth Miller circumcised?

    • Rob Taylor

      There is a blog on the internet that lists intact famous men. Wentworth is mentioned as he said he was intact during an interview on BBC. I am so glad as uncut is way hot.

  44. wet 4 life

    he’s so hottttttttttttttttttttttttttt in every picture

  45. Flo

    So crazy, that’s universal, (I’m french). Who doesn’t want to have sex with Wentworth Miller???

  46. Graham

    You do realise he is gay. Yes he is very hot even though he has put on weight now

  47. Pingback: Wet For Went is One Year Old today! « Wet For Went

  48. Annie Love

    UMM AMAZING.. Its funny and amazing timing.. So your closing the website? will it still be up? please say it will still be up

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