Did you forget about me? You must not be in the business of granting the wishes of good girls like me or else I would have met The Perfect One by now. You may think that b/c I’ve kind of slacked up on the posting that I no longer desire to lick His Hotness but I can assure you, that is not the case. You know, in a way, I even kind of deserve it. I know that it is you that usually makes these kinds of determinations, but dammit, I earned this. Get off your fat ass and help me out or the reindeer gets it. I’m sick of this shit…
Went. At my door. Now.
P.S. Thanks for getting Went a new coat; It’s fab.
P.P.S. I’m sorry I called you a fatass but I’m really really ready for my present now. Really.